Map Time

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December 13-19, 2006

Made in the North Bay:


Jordan Thomas, a 25-year-old graphic designer who works for the Map Store in Windsor, may look like he’s fresh out of high school, but he knows what he’s talking about when it comes to cartography. Passing under layers of rolled maps stowed overhead, he strides through the store–a sea of globe key chains, globe-painted basketballs, GPS doodads and software, map magnifying glasses and fold-out maps of Missoula, Hanoi and noteworthy baseball sites–and finally arrives at his destination: a map.

This map is the eagerly awaited update of Sonoma County’s American Viticultural Areas (AVAs), boundaries that differentiate wine-growing regions from one another based on terroir. Until now, the map hadn’t been revised since 1997. Thomas estimates that Sonoma County wine-related agriculture has almost doubled and that some 60 percent of vineyard names have changed in the past decade. The Map Store took it upon itself to revise the map, relying on the Sonoma County Grape Growers Association (who had sponsored the 1997 edition) for help. The project took Thomas and others roughly one year to complete, and the result is a series of six maps focusing on different areas within Sonoma County ($29.95 each).

Since 1997, some of the AVA boundaries have changed. Thomas points to a jagged purple line on the map, which indicates the Russian River AVA’s new limit. Thanks to a petition by growers, that prestigious AVA now encompasses vineyards around Santa Rosa and Sebastopol, allowing affected wineries to sell their products at higher rates. But looking at the map gets a bit complicated because of AVA overlap. Thomas points to one area that belongs to six AVAs.

Heading back to his desk, Thomas admits that the project had its challenges. He had thought it might be a good idea to collect the data he needed online; this way, it could easily be updated anytime. So the store set up a website, encouraging vineyard, winery and tasting-room representatives to submit their geographical coordinates via the Internet.

“We tried to make it easy, and for the most part, everyone was happy that we were doing this, but there were some we just couldn’t please,” says Thomas. “I’m 25 and I’m trying to explain to a 70-year-old man why he should use the Internet. The situation’s set up for conflict.”

Scott Lowrie, also 25, commiserates. Some wine professionals had particular trouble locating their assessor’s parcel number, even though the Map Store had provided illustrated instructions on where to find it. Lowrie contributed a lot of the Geographic Information Systems work for the map, and says, “There were days when the phone wouldn’t stop ringing; we couldn’t get anything done.”

Despite the meticulous detail and accuracy, Thomas doesn’t have plans to send the maps to cartographical archives, like the treasured Map Division of the New York Public Library. He says there’s no need. The maps are available online, and digital technology allows for frequent updates.

In fact, the Map Store is in the process of making a solely electronic map of Sonoma County that includes soil, climate data and parcel lines, “so you can get a feel for specific influences on each vineyard,” says Thomas.

When the store management does actually want to print an edition of maps, they use their on-site printer to release updates whenever the need arises, rather than outsourcing massive batches. In fact, Thomas already plans to print an update to the Sonoma County AVA maps this spring.

Later, Lowrie sets to work, printing large-scale aerial photos. He dons a pair of white gloves and prepares a large roll of glossy paper to feed into a printer, which someone has affectionately labeled “MAPPY.” Clearly, map lovers belong here.

The Map Store, 9091 Windsor Road, Windsor. 707.838.4290.


Wigstock ’66

December 13-19, 2006

Elephantiasis is supposed to be a tropical disease, but in the theaters it strikes in the winter months, right before Oscar time. In this year’s newest outbreak, Bill Condon, screenwriter for Chicago, directs and adapts Dreamgirls, the hit 1981 stage musical, for the age of bigger films.

Dreamgirls takes a fluid, small-scale piece and pumps it up to pachyderm size. Henry Krieger and Tom Eyen’s musical debuted when disco was ravaging the world, thus the show’s much-reprised title theme sounds more like Giorgio Morodor than Motown’s hit team Holland-Dozier-Holland. That’s surprising, since Dreamgirls is so firmly based on the Supremes that rumor says Diana Ross walked out during the first act when she went to see it.

Dreamgirls is an extremely basic backstage musical, wrought by people who probably could have acted out every Alice Faye/Don Ameche film ever made. Chunky Effie (Jennifer Hudson), willowy Deena (Beyoncé Knowles) and the half-bright Lorrell (Anika Noni Rose) make up the Dreamettes, friends since childhood.

The story begins with the trio losing a fixed battle of the bands in Detroit. A lucky break gets them adopted as the touring band of R&B hitmaker James “Thunder” Early (Eddie Murphy), legendary as a jive turkey who hits on his backup singers. A Berry Gordy figure named Curtis Taylor (Jamie Foxx) moves laterally from Cadillac sales to music producing. The Dreamettes–whom Curtis renames the Dreams (rhymes with “Supremes”)–hit the charts.

The movie’s slighter moments prove to be more pleasurable than the by-the-book conflict and drama: the slinky gowns and towering wigs; the travel montages; a kid band pastiching the Jackson 5; and the way the girls are coached to turn on a dime onstage. At its best, Dreamgirls serves as a tribute to the satisfying myth that a somebody is just a nobody who got the right chance.

As an actress, Beyoncé is really just a pair of lovely eyes. She is just as uneasy onscreen as Ross was everywhere but in Lady Sings the Blues. Jennifer Hudson is sparkly and barbed as Effie, whose heftiness gets her shoved off to one side, just as in real life the trouble-prone Florence Ballard was replaced by Cindy Birdsong in the Supremes. The droll, wickedly accomplished Hudson survives a badly underwritten part that tries to have it both ways: claiming that Effie is too ungrateful and troublesome to let the show go on and yet wanting us to feel she’s been shoved aside and betrayed by Curtis’ overwhelming urge to whiten up the Dreams’ sound.

While it’s her acting that really appeals, Hudson has a vast voice–a huge one, the kind that slaughters crowds–which is why so many thousands rallied for her to win her spot on American Idol. Hudson gives 150 percent when she sings, and she’s a master of those powerfully ornate vocal runs that turn every simple song into a Moorish palace of arabesques.

On a bare stage, alone, Hudson’s Effie is crying out for love that no man, no family, no audience could ever supply. It’s a show-stopper, of course, and at the preview screening there was spontaneous applause. And those who raved are at one with the long dead crowds who applauded Sophie Tucker, Kate Smith and other big voices of the past.

‘Dreamgirls’ has an exclusive San Francisco engagement Dec. 15-24, yet another reason to plan a City Day before Christmas. It opens everywhere Dec. 25.


New and upcoming film releases.

Browse all movie reviews.

The Byrne Report

December 13-19, 2006

Three years ago, Sonoma County resident Terence Hallinan lost a bitterly contested race for reelection as San Francisco’s district attorney. Forced from the media spotlight, where he relished being at the epicenter of legal and political controversy, Hallinan quietly carved himself a niche defending drug dealers and lobbying on behalf of pornographers. The ex-district attorney’s new career path is not surprising, considering his previous propensity to portray some crimes of moral turpitude–such as smoking weed and soliciting prostitutes–as politically correct and largely unprosecutable.

During two contentious terms as district attorney, the politically pugilistic Hallinan, known as “Kayo,” was internationally renowned as the voice of liberal (some say libertine) San Francisco. In 1996, he was the only district attorney in California to endorse Proposition 215, which legalized the possession and cultivation of medical marijuana. And in matters sexual and consensual, Hallinan strongly advocated for the decriminalization of prostitution. So it is not surprising that, since leaving office, Hallinan became a go-to guy for dopers of all persuasions, multiple mavens of the medicinal marijuana industry and sexual impresarios who pimp women’s bodies.

At an age when many lawyers retire, Hallinan is pounding the street for fees. The craggy-faced former prosecutor, 70, says he keeps a criminal defense calendar with a specialty in drug cases. He also represents the business interests of Jim Mitchell, who operates the O’Farrell Theater, a strip joint and porn palace in the Tenderloin. And he represents 14 of the city’s 40 pot clubs in efforts to obtain and keep city permits to operate medical marijuana dispensaries.

Last year, after the board of supervisors required pot clubs to make their facilities handicapped-accessible, Hallinan lobbied, in vain, for such “extreme” requirements to be reduced. “It is not like a pot club is a candy store that can just go out and find a place,” Hallinan explains in recent interview by phone from his San Francisco office.

At quitting time each day, Hallinan drives home to Petaluma. “I live on a farm with three cows, two goats, a couple of sheep, a wife and a daughter,” he says. And he is becoming a figure in North Bay courts. He recently got a parole violation for Will Foster, a convicted drug offender, squashed in Sonoma County Superior Court. And he regularly schleps to Mendocino County, where he concentrates on defending marijuana growers who use Proposition 215 as a defense against drug charges. Hallinan seldom goes to trial. “I have done a lot of cases where we head it off before a person is charged by showing the doctor’s medical marijuana recommendation to the district attorney or the judge.”

Doc Knapp, spokesperson for the Sonoma Alliance for Medicinal Marijuana, considers Hallinan to be a smoking class hero. “He spoke on our behalf before the Sebastopol city council,” Knapp, who hangs with Hallinan socially, says. Indeed, the former prosecuter is passionate about marijuana use. Alongside Woody Harrelson and Bill Maher, he sits on the advisory board of the National Organization for the Reform of Marijuana Laws. And in his raspy baritone, he regularly addresses gatherings of marijuana users around the country in favor of legalizing pot.

Kayo is also passionate about protecting sleazploitation. He recently lobbied the city on behalf of the Mitchell Brothers’ organization after the San Francisco Commission on the Status of Woman proposed legislation to ban private booths in adult clubs. The commission had received reports that, because the clubs pay lap dancers minimum wage, the women are forced to prostitute themselves in private rooms in order to make a living. Stretching credulity, Hallinan denied that prostitution takes place in the sex clubs. During our interview, he pooh-poohed the wage problem: “These women make a lot of money. Many are single mothers raising children. One woman put herself through law school with the money she made.”

Dr. Emily Murase, executive director of the Department on the Status of Women, told me, “Dancers have testified that they are coerced into sexual acts with customers in private booths. Club owners charge them nightly stage fees of up to $500 in clear violation of both the San Francisco police code and the California Labor Code.”

But Hallinan has never been a stickler for the letter of the law when it butts up against his personal predilections. “Look at Proposition 215,” he muses. “There is hardly an type of medical condition that, if helped by marijuana, wouldn’t be within the legal qualifications, such as headaches, in-grown toenails or feeling better by virtue of using marijuana. And I am absolutely convinced that that for some people, smoking marijuana is part of their religious practice.”

So is drinking blood.

or


My Year on Meth

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December 13-19, 2006


Editor’s note: This year, the Bohemian gave focus to the effects of methamphetamine on the North Bay, producing five features and several news stories. All but . Here are her final thoughts on this series.

For the past 12 months I’ve been on methamphetamine–not snorting, smoking or shooting it, but writing about it. I’ve interviewed recovering addicts, treatment counselors, narcotics detectives, child-protection case workers, judges, prosecutors, teachers, parents, social workers, psychiatrists and anyone else with insight into the impacts of this cheap, easily available and extremely addictive substance. I’ve waded through bureaucratic reports, scanned photos of meth busts, read rants on how drug use is a victimless crime and pored over countless lists of street names for meth. I’ve accumulated more than 15 pounds of printouts, notes and interview transcripts.

A year ago, I might have walked through a supermarket, spotted a certain kind of shopper and thought, “Hmmm, that’s a really skinny, twitchy woman.” Now I say, “Ah, meth.”

Since my first story was published March 29, I’ve been amazed at how many average-looking people have quietly confided to me that they’re in recovery from their meth addition, or that a family member or close friend is struggling with an overwhelming desire for this insidious drug.

What I’ve learned from my year on meth is that this drug steals dreams from the young, who should be full of hope. Meth warps both the present and the future, not just for its users and abusers, but also for their parents, grandparents, siblings, children and friends–anyone who loves and cares for them.

I’ve also learned that addicts aren’t necessarily stupid and aren’t necessarily poor.

In Colorado, influential pastor Ted Haggard was recently “outed” for using meth while visiting a male prostitute. Haggard claims he bought the drugs but threw them away–once a month for three consecutive years.

In New York City, a $250,000-a-year bank executive who set up a meth lab in his $6,000-a-month penthouse apartment was recently busted. The guy got caught because he used an Internet site to order chemicals that are legal but essential for one style of meth production. Authorities also nabbed a Columbia University graduate student who apparently was using his self-made, extremely pure meth supply to fuel his all-night studies.

Meth’s pernicious influence is so widespread that the federal government is promoting “community partnerships” among local law enforcement, treatment centers, courts, social services and others to create a focused, collaborative approach to the overwhelming problems that accompany this drug.

The good news is that research shows proper treatment does work; people can get off and stay off of meth. The bad news is that meth goes inside brain cells, damaging them. It takes at least a year or more for the body to heal itself, and not everyone’s brain recovers completely.

In the past year, absolutely none of the addicts I met were able to get clean and sober on their first attempt. They’ll often try rehab two, three or more times before finally breaking clear of the drug. It takes persistence and a program set up to counteract the long-term effects of this manmade substance, not just the initial issues of getting clean and sober.

The first recovering addict I wrote about was Dennis, who deliberately smashed his pickup into an oak tree because he had failed a drug test and needed an excuse to miss a court date. Eventually, he was sentenced to a drug court program with intensive counseling through the Drug Abuse Alternatives Center. This August, Dennis celebrated three years of sobriety. No longer homeless or sponging off others, Dennis now has his own home and is raising his 13-year-old son because the boy’s mother is still on drugs. Dennis is also paying off some old bills, which accumulated during the 12 years he was high on meth and alcohol. “It’s been difficult at times,” he admits. “I’m cleaning up the wreckage slowly but surely.”

Also doing well are Carole and her two children, who were featured in the “Moms and Meth” article published the week before Mother’s Day. When I catch Carole on the phone, she can’t talk long because she’s on her way to a 12-step meeting. She’s happy to have moved into a three-bedroom townhouse apartment where it’s just she and her kids. And she’s been doing a lot of public speaking lately, telling her story in hopes it will help others.

“It’s nice to give back, to heighten the awareness of the community that there is a problem and there are solutions,” Carole explains. “It’s rewarding for me; it keeps me grateful.”

The teenagers have been the most difficult to write about. This summer, I sat at my computer keyboard with tears in my eyes, trying to reconcile their fresh, young faces and matter-of-fact voices with the horrific tales they told of their tweaker lives. Lying. Stealing. Homelessness. Helplessness. Doing anything and everything for the drug, and now wrestling daily to stay in recovery at 15, 16 or 17 years old.

I struggled to do justice to their stories, knowing that relapse rates indicate most of them will face even more hell before they’ll manage to stay clean for any length of time. I finally had to ask for a deadline extension–something I’ve done less than five times in the last 11 years–so I could take some time to manufacture a bit of hope, at least in my own mind.

Counselor Ken Kennemer at the Clean and Sober School in Petaluma reports that all the teens I interviewed there have consistently stayed away from meth this past year, and are working hard to restart their lives. “The beautiful side of it is that it doesn’t take a lot of recovery to give them some hope,” Kennemer says.

I keep remembering a pair of fuzzy pink baby socks pinned to a bulletin board in a local residential drug treatment center. They were left behind by a young woman who walked away from her newborn baby because meth’s strident call was far stronger than the tenuous bonds of motherhood.

What have I learned this year? That we all need to work together if we don’t want more tiny pink socks pinned to bulletin boards. That we can’t avoid the problems of meth because they’re all around us, tearing holes in the fabric of our communities. And that it’s important to manufacture new hope, in one form or another, because meth destroys dreams.


Letters to the Editor

December 13-19, 2006

Make the connection, man

Regarding (Nov. 29), until this herb is legalized, it behooves everyone who uses it to make a quality connection with the grower, by whatever mean available, and verify if the marijuana is indeed OOO (only outdoor organic). Anything else is a rip-off and a sham (and a shame).

T. S. Force, Ukiah

Poor Humor

I am very offended by the “Slice O’ Life” cartoon in your Dec. 6 issue (print edition only). Since when are frugality and recycling considered subjects worthy of ridicule? Is your arrogant and ignorant cartoonist–and your editors–so deeply immersed in the culture of consumerism that he believes wastefulness is some sort of virtue, and that spending money unnecessarily is to be encouraged? Sure, extreme cheapskateness may be an apt target for joking, but some of the activities dumped on in these panels make perfect sense to me, as well as to many of your readers who happen to be at the shorter end of the disposable-income spectrum. Basically, cartoonist Crespo sounds like the kind of fool that the corporate puppet masters drool over, with values so skewered and self-destructive that he’s allowed himself to be convinced that handing over as much of his cash as possible to the economy is the noble, honorable, socially responsible and somehow cool way to behave. I find the cartoon not funny, but sadly sick and shameful in the message it sends; placing it in such a prominent site makes your paper look ridiculous, too.

Walter Loniak, Sebastopol

Dearest Walter: Ouch! We’d write back to you privately via post, but did you know that stamps recently went up to 39 cents–each? It may also surprise you to learn that the massive editorial staff here at the Boho (five of us show up if there’s free food) are not exactly awash in the kind of heady dosh one always hears about alt journalists pulling down (and rolling naked in before banking). The cartoon, by virtue of its genre, was a poke, fillip, a sweet, a savory, a slice of life. Sorry that you didn’t find it funny.

A modest proposal

Upon reading recently that it’s almost a certainty Saddam will hang, a thought occurred to me: Why not allow this man to partially redeem himself by helping to pay reparations to a few of the victims of his crimes? Can you imagine HBO showing Saddam’s moment of departure live on pay-per-view? This indeed would be a big-ticket attraction guaranteed to earn hundreds of millions of dollars, which could be fairly distributed (by an ethical, impartial committee) among victims of his crimes.

Of course it would have to be handled impeccably, with the utmost reverence and respect, and as the important historical event it is. (But I wouldn’t want to miss Jon Stewart and Leno after it happens.) I know the likelihood of this happening is less than miniscule, but to me, chronicling (and marketing) an inevitable event for the benefit of people who have suffered directly as a result of the crimes Saddam is being hanged for makes good sense.

Stephen D. Gross, Monte Rio

Mary’s immaculate conception?

It was noted in the paper the same day that the Iraq Study Group’s report came out that Vice President Dick Cheney’s daughter Mary was pregnant. As I have been unemployed for a while now, I have way too much spare time to come up with questions like the following: If, God forbid, after the baby is born, something were to happen to Mary Cheney, who would get custody? Mary’s partner Heather Poe, a lesbian living in a state that does not recognize gay marriage or civil unions, let alone gay adoptions? Or grandparents Dick and Lynne Cheney, the former a pathological liar and torture advocate well known for being careless with firearms, and the latter, an unapologetic author of pornographic literature?

What would be “in the best interests of the child?” as the so-called right-to-lifers are always asking?

Rich Jones, Monte Rio


Ask Sydney

December 13-19, 2006

Gentle Reader: As the holidays descend like a viper’s mouth to suck the blood from our wallets, please remember that there is a place you can go for answers. What sorts of questions does the month of December bring up for you? Take a minute to write in and enlighten us all with your quandaries. Write to as*******@*on.net or as*******@******an.com.–Sydney

Dear Sydney, I have two jobs, so how come I’m always so fucking broke?–Broken in Two

Dear Broke: I’m going to let you in on a little secret, one that they don’t tell you about in high school. If you want to make a barely acceptable living in these parts, then you need to work at least 36 hours a week and make at least $20 an hour. And this is assuming you’re single. If you have a family, then you’ll need twice this amount. Here’s my suggestion to you: Go to the library and check out a bunch of books on how to make a living. Most of these books are enjoyable to read, with pictures and yearly salaries, and personality suggestions, like, “If you enjoy working alone, consider being a night clerk in a hotel!”

Take notes, talk to people about what they do, look online at the most desirable careers and then either go back to school, start your own business or otherwise pursue some means of making money that does not include crappy low-wage employment. If you don’t do this, you may be perfectly content, but you will not be financially secure.

Use the low-wage work as a temporary vehicle for helping you pursue more important things. There’s nothing wrong with living hand-to-mouth; move into your car if you really want to be free. But if you feel the call of the material world, the need for nice things, good food and a secure apartment, then you will never make it in the North Bay on low-wage work. Even the so-called living wage is a joke. The rents around here are too high, food costs too much and even a movie is more expensive than an hour of labor at a minimum-wage job. Above all, always keep it simple. The less you put out, financially, the better. In other words, don’t waste your money. There’re a thousand things to buy, but we need very few of them.

Dear Sydney, how do I get rid of the winter humdrums? I try to fight it, but it always seems like no matter how hard I try, I always get hit.–In the Dumps

Dear Dumps: Damn the wintertime blues! Damn them to hell! Winter is the time of year when many of us are prone to becoming emotionally drained. This is due to a number of very obvious reasons: it’s dark all of the time, colds and flus are on the loose, it’s freezing or gray and raining, and vitamin K is in short supply. To combat the environmental blues, be proactive. Don’t just sit by and let the humdrums strike. Make an effort to spend more time with friends. Plan a revolving potluck meal, at least once a week. Eat warming foods. Take lots of baths, with candles. Drink plenty of coffee or hot chocolate. Start a new book. Pursue a project you have been dreaming about doing, but haven’t made the time for.

The winter is a time to slow down and stay inside. For once you aren’t obligated to be out doing something athletic and fun! What a relief! Light a fire and relax. Let winter envelop you like a quilt, not like a rain cloud. In these parts, it’s too easy to be caught off-guard by the onslaught of January, by the rain and cold. December was so beautiful and sunny! you think. Maybe it will never get miserable! Believe me, it will. So be ready for it this year. If you can afford a weekend away, make it a weekend in February, the dankest of months. If you can’t, then make this winter the season where you learn a new instrument, start going to the ice rink, or at the very least, buy some full-spectrum bulbs for your favorite lamps. It couldn’t hurt.

Dear Sydney, in Sebastopol, there are people who stand on the corner of Main Street and Bodega Avenue every Friday afternoon with signs. On three of the corners are the peace people, and on one of the corners are the war people. They have been there every Friday for years now, and though I appreciate that they take the time to stand out there and hold up signs for peace, sometimes it feels sort of uncomfortable, like when the war guy is saluting everyone until you think his arm might fall off, and the peace people are waving their signs, and some people are honking at the war people, and some people are waving peace fingers at the peace people, and I just feel sort of stressed out when I get stuck at a red light. Sometimes I wonder, does it really make a difference, having any of them stand there at all? Then I feel bad for thinking it.–Distraught on Red

Dear Red: I understand your discomfiture. It can feel a little strange, as we putt through town, burning fossil fuels and spewing carbon dioxide in the faces of the protesters, even a little twisted maybe. But here’s the thing: it does make a difference. It makes a difference because we have to stop, right there at the red light, and think about what’s going on. And whether or not we’re saluting the war people or peace-signing the peace people, it’s vital that we not forget what’s going on. We may not always like it, but there is something worthwhile in that minute and a half or less that drivers have as they pass through that four-way intersection, heading off in all directions.

Does it make a difference in a larger sense? Will the war end or keep on going because a handful of people stand at a busy intersection one day a week for a few hours? Of course not. But there is a general apathy that descends with powerlessness, and if all it takes is waving a sign around to make a community of people feel as if there is something they can do, then it’s worth the moment. The only aspect of the Main Street dance that makes me uncomfortable is when the peace people have a henchman on the war corner. We have to respect the voices of others, even if we don’t like what they have to say. Can’t we just be gracious and give them their damn corner?

No question too big, too small or too off-the-wall.


Upvalley, Downvalley

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December 6-12, 2006

Editor’s note: This is the first of a two-part series looking at the dichotomies and growing pains of Napa.

This fall at an art opening in the city of Napa, a group of twenty- and thirty-somethings migrated outside for cigarettes, taking seats in the neighboring smog-check facility’s parking lot. Although it was dark, they chatted under shelter of a canvas sun umbrella that was strung with tired Christmas lights.

Not everyone knew each other, so they gingerly introduced themselves. In the city of Napa, introductions can be particularly uncomfortable. With a population of roughly 71,500, Napa is mostly a place of working-class families and city dwellers who have rewarded themselves with lavish country pieds-à-terre. The few young people living here often arrive in answer to the savory call of its vast service industry; very little else exists to draw them. Meeting someone new who’s between the ages of 24 and 38 and doesn’t have a family is surprising.

The saying about never having a second chance to make a first impression carries a lot of weight in Napa, where there are so few first impressions to be made.

Puffing on his cigarette in the smog-check parking lot, a young man introduced himself to the group. Despite the pressure to get the first impression right, he got off to a good start.

“I grew up in St. Helena,” he offered amiably. “And I spent my whole life correcting people who’d say, ‘So, you’re from Napa?'”

Then, with a grin, he revealed how he usually answered these queries: “No, I’m from Napa Valley.”

Everyone got the joke but no one said anything to protest the volatile distinction he had just made. This is typical. People don’t like to talk about it. With just a few words, he had exposed a latent, long-standing bifurcation in the mindset of Napa Valley.

Valley Views

Featuring swimming pools and vineyards, a “Living the Wine Country Dream” advertising supplement in a recent Sunday New York Times implied that the Napa Valley is one cohesive entity, a peaceful land of bacchanalian luxury. With the Robb Report as its constitution and Francis Ford Coppola as its prime minister, this fantasy Napa Valley bears Pat Kuleto as a mascot and sings Screaming Eagle for a battle cry.

While this marketing ploy may have framed public perception of the region, Napa Valley is far from uniform. In fact, the phrase “Napa Valley,” while it has long existed, has only gained popularity during the last 15 years as a way to bring tourists to the whole valley, not just St. Helena. For example, the county’s daily paper, the Napa Valley Register, established in 1863, didn’t add “Valley” to the middle of its name until 1991.

Although what we call Napa Valley roughly encompasses Napa County, the term excludes certain areas. Among these forgotten places is the largely Seventh-Day Adventist community of Angwin, where stores downtown generally don’t sell alcohol, tobacco or meat. Also overlooked is the burgeoning suburbia of American Canyon, a 14-year-old bedroom community that is seemingly always involved in negotiations with Wal-Mart.

Opposing attitudes in Napa Valley boil down to roughly two camps: upvalley and downvalley. The terms pepper conversation and commercial signage. Local companies–especially real estate agencies–eagerly bill themselves as upvalley. On the other hand, businesses at the south end of the valley aren’t as keen to use the phrase “downvalley.” These are loaded terms, and even making a correction as simple as “No, I live upvalley” can carry a snide connotation to some ears.

It’s almost as if an invisible line divides the two regions. Locals say it falls just south of Yountville, and when pressed, give its exact coordinates: Oak Knoll Avenue, on Highway 29, just north of the popular restaurant Bistro Don Giovanni. Latitude: 38°21’11” north.

Upvalley comprises the towns of Yountville and St. Helena. Though situated even farther north than St. Helena, Calistoga, population 5,200, is not quite an upvalley town. It has spas and the posh Calistoga Ranch resort but still lacks even a community swimming pool of its own. (The city, where many immigrants and service workers live, does finally have plans to build one, despite complaints from the Concerned Citizens of Calistoga–a group concerned mostly with the noise of laughter and belly flops.)

With a population of 3,328, Yountville measures roughly the size of one-eighth of a teaspoon. But it makes up for it with mighty French restaurants, extolled globally by food writers with inexhaustible budgets. Ten minutes away, the city of St. Helena, population 6,000, is equally chichi; even the local burger joint serves ahi tuna.

Downvalley lies the city of Napa. Despite ongoing and contentious efforts to jump on the wine-tourism bandwagon, Napa is still considered by some as the spit bucket of wine country. At one end of Main Street, Angèle and Celadon restaurants have adopted upvalley’s culinary standards. But at the other end of Main Street, the Salvation Army store and an ancient sewing shop, NorMar Fabrics & Gifts, still linger as reminders of more modest times. In the middle of Main, there stood until recently a meringue of an eatery: the Café Society, where for $5, Francophiles could go once a week for a bit of French conversation. The cafe has since closed, because in some senses, there is no society here. It’s been priced out to make way for tourists.

To downvalley folks, their northern neighbors are snobby and stiff. To upvalley residents, Napa seems inferior, a reminder that wine country aesthetic doesn’t extend indefinitely. Some refer to Napa as Vallejo North. Upvalley towns are immaculately manicured and exclusive to those who can afford the stratospheric housing prices, although downvalley’s housing is not exactly affordable, either. Downvalley has a blue-collar feel, with strip malls, flood problems and grit. Upvalley has the French Laundry; downvalley has Denny’s.

The spirit of St. Helena defines not only upvalley, but also the idealized, unified Napa Valley to which that New York Times ad section alluded. When the young man at the art opening told people he was from Napa Valley, as opposed to Napa, he was really getting in a jab at downvalley and disavowing any connection to it. And he’s not the only one. A winery owner with a Napa address reportedly changed it to read “Napa Valley” instead. Farther south in American Canyon, the Wallaby Yogurt Company tacked a postally irrelevant “Napa County” onto its address.

While the city of Napa is located in the Napa Valley, it still lacks Napa Valley’s cachet. Downvalley is where tourists land by mistake.

Class of ‘Napkins’

It’s a few weeks after the art opening on another dark night in the city of Napa, and cousins Will DeLong and Aaron Hill stand in their driveway contemplating how to better organize their tool shop. A hand-written sign asking “Got Wood?” is taped up in the open shop, and in the driveway stand a sawhorse and wheelbarrow, hinting at their business, Stonehill Construction.

DeLong, 33, has lived in Napa since he was three, excluding a six-year service in the military from 1991 to 1997. He has a young face, despite his dark beard and glasses. Wearing a tie-dye shirt and working on a beer, DeLong is hesitant to say that upvalley and downvalley are actually in conflict.

“I don’t know if there’s really a conflict where we would take arms up against each other,” says DeLong. Instead, he sees it as a class difference. But from his point of view, almost nobody acknowledges this class divide, because talking about money makes people uncomfortable. Napans aren’t particularly eager to identify themselves as earning a more modest income, and St. Helenans don’t necessarily want to call attention to their wealth. “It’s just sort of an understated thing,” DeLong says.

Of course, gentility only goes so far, and extravagant architectural homages to wine do the talking that their owners shy away from. Although these edifices are starting to migrate farther and farther south–some of the most extravagant are now located on the Silverado Trail in the city of Napa–they don’t belong to the downvalley mentality.

“Most people in Napa city are just–we repair the wineries,” DeLong says without bitterness. “We’re the working class folks that fix everything in the wine industry.”

The epithet “Napkin,” a play on the word for the city’s residents, probably derives from Upstairs, Downstairs dichotomy of the valley. Napans claim that the dishrag moniker was created by the upvalley contingent but occasionally use it to describe themselves self-mockingly.

DeLong, who earns a large part of his living by working for people affiliated with wineries, looks forward to the jobs they provide him. “[These people] have good taste. They have money to create things to reflect their good taste.”

But he isn’t as sanguine about the resulting tourism industry. With frustration, he imitates tourist looky-loos, who are too busy admiring grapes to even drive the speed limit. Clogging the valley’s only two major north-south thoroughfares, tourists make getting to work on time an anxious adrenaline rush for locals. “But ultimately, it’s my bread and butter,” DeLong shrugs, acknowledging that everyone who lives in a destination area has issues with tourists.

Stonehill Construction co-owner Aaron Hill, 29, grew up in Oakville, a small area between Napa and Yountville, attended St. Helena High School, and now lives in Napa. Hill says upvalley/downvalley tensions are nothing new.

“It’s always been there. Growing up in St. Helena, it’s like, ‘Oh, it’s Napa’–it’s lower class,” he says, imitating a fey tone. “At least in high school, it was looked on as the little people in Napa. But when you get older, everybody lives in Napa, because nobody can afford to live in St. Helena.

“Even Napa, though, really, if we didn’t have the good-fortune to buy this house from our grandparents, we would never have been able to afford to live here,” Hill adds as an afterthought.

Town & Country

In a pastoral part of Napa city limits, telephones at the radio station KVON ring incessantly as residents call in two fires simultaneously blazing in the valley. General Manager and KVON program director Jeff Schechtman, 56, sits in a glass-walled office across from a giant, glass coffee table. His hair is slickly combed and he’s wearing a salmon FaÁonnable button-down shirt, dark tie and jeans. Originally from Long Island–evident in his accent–Schechtman worked as a movie producer in Los Angeles for many years, moved to St. Helena about 10 years ago, and relocated to the city of Napa three or four years later.

Schechtman characterizes the upvalley/downvalley opposition not as a schism, but as a difference between two very unlike places. “Yountville and St. Helena represent the wine business,” he says. “They represent everybody’s vision, the fantasy vision of what Napa Valley is.”

Schechtman has long advocated for gentrification and economic development in the city of Napa, which would bring it up to par with its upvalley counterparts as a tourist destination. “The city of Napa for a long time was not a part of that,” he explains. “It didn’t share in that at all. The irony of it is that it shared in it by virtue of its name. So to most people outside of the Bay Area, it was part of the Napa Valley, but it did nothing to take advantage of that. Even though if it had tried to take advantage of that sooner, it probably would have helped economically. But it didn’t! And part of the reason why it didn’t is because of the old-timers, [who] had a kind of resentment for what was changing their valley.”

Historically, Napa and St. Helena have stood for different things. Even before the tourist boom, St. Helena’s population primarily comprised gentlemen farmers and, later, university-educated men who bought vineyards there. In comparison, Napa has long been the industrial center of the valley, with a tannery, a butcher shop and a state hospital for the mentally ill. Napans worked in heavy industry at Kaiser Steel and the Basalt Rock Company, or commuted to work at the Mare Island Naval Shipyard near Vallejo.

Speaking by phone from her home in Napa, Lauren Coodley, author of Napa: The Transformation of an American Town and professor of psychology and history at Napa Valley College, says that for a very long time the upvalley/downvalley areas have been separate in terms of industrial vs. agricultural economies and urban vs. rural environments. Coodley characterizes these as “ancient polarities between country and town.”

“I think the things the groups imagine about each other are not really very valid,” says Coodley, whose ex-husband grew up in St. Helena. “But it’s true that there is a distance. If you put it into a historic perspective between town and country, it makes sense.”

“The origin of the rift is probably pre-tourism. Country people see city people as different–maybe rougher, less agrarian,” says Coodley. She doesn’t necessarily agree that St. Helenans look down at Napans, but if such snobbery exists, she attributes it to “a kind of class contempt for people who work in industry.”

From the historical perspective of those in the city of Napa, upvalley was a world wholly unrelated to them. “Upvalley meant more affluent people, people who live in their little world of wineries, probably who don’t work with their hands for a living. This was to some degree always a misnomer,” says Coodley, who points out that working-class people lived there, too. But upvalley was at least perceived as a “Brigadoon community, immune from the stresses and strife of Napa,” she says.

“Upvalley, they drank wine; down here, they drank beer and whiskey. The alcohol difference sort of epitomizes the irony of the situation,” she says. “People down here had contempt for wine snobbery.”

The reason why the upvalley vs. downvalley divide persists even today is, according to Coodley, a result of how the two regions perceived each other’s development as the modern wine industry took hold in Napa County. Robert and Margrit Mondavi began paving the way for the wine industry’s resurgence in the mid-’60s. And after the Paris Wine Tasting of 1976, a blind tasting that successfully pitted Napa wines against French wines, Napa’s victories put the region on the global map.

Despite its new-found recognition, the valley didn’t respond to the tourism demands uniformly. Upvalley towns seemed to transition almost seamlessly. But the city of Napa had a delayed reaction to jumping on the wine-tourism bandwagon, because wine wasn’t really relevant to the community. Only in the past dozen or so years has the city clumsily struggled to become more of a tourist attraction.

Like many other residents, Coodley draws the invisible line between upvalley and downvalley just south of Yountville, but for a different reason: it represents the rural-urban limit. “Upvalley is where all the farms are. People resenting this remember when so much of Napa was farmland too. What is now Wal-Mart was the livestock auction place during the ’30s and ’40s,” she says.

“Probably, people in Napa and St. Helena are shocked that Napa has allowed the sprawl, the subdivisions, the lack of planning,” Coodley continues. “I think they’re kind of scornful. It’s obvious that Napa has made some disastrous planning–or lack thereof–decisions. I think it’s clear that developers have had their way with Napa.” But this issue has never really been articulated, and that’s what Coodley thinks is causing upvalley vs. downvalley tensions to persist. “People who live in St. Helena are stunned by the traffic, the congestion, the chain stores. Why did they even let all that happen?” she says.

“Maybe St. Helenans think that Napa is just kind of,” she pauses to search for a word, “metastasizing, and that its lost its identity. But there’s misunderstanding on both sides. If they had an educated understanding, Napa would realize that St. Helena had militantly resisted their development.”

But for all its Brigadoon charm, St. Helena has its own set of problems. The city has restricted development so much that affording a home there is almost impossible for anyone earning less than six figures, which means that there’s practically no middle class.

On the other hand, the upvalley vs. downvalley rift could be more imaginary than real. All it takes to perceive twinges of snobbery or inferiority is a hint of suspicion.

Eric Nelson, who grew up in the city of Napa and is now executive director of the Napa Valley Museum in Yountville, explains, “It’s more a sense that every community sees that they’re special in their own particular way, and like any of us, we tend to think we’re more special than our neighbors.”

Dr. Marty Nemko, part-time Napa resident and contributing editor for U.S. News & World Report, says, “We have prestige hierarchies everywhere, and people judge each other based on the most trivial criteria, like socioeconomic status. I’d be surprised if Napa Valley was immunefrom something that’s almost a ubiquitous worldwide predisposition.”

Full Circle

Back at the art opening in Napa, while the twenty- and thirty-somethings continued to introduce each other in the parking lot, some younger kids clustered around a craft table inside. They were making hood ornaments, which was surreal, because they couldn’t yet drive. But the strangest thing was that cone-shaped hair dryers hung over their heads. The venue for this art opening was a hair salon. Meanwhile, spill-over crowd trickled in from another art opening, underway at a wine lounge a few blocks away. The only way galleries seem to be able to survive in the city of Napa is by doubling as salons, wine bars, frame stores or real estate offices.

Similarly, the city itself is leading a double life, transitioning from a place that serves its locals to a place that serves tourists. The hazy distinctions that characterize the valley’s two ideological poles come into sharp relief here as the invisible line moves farther south, scrambling the innards of the city of Napa. Whereas upvalley’s fate is already sealed, the city of Napa is the front line of a struggle between pro-tourist forces that want to make it continuous with the appeal of Yountville or St. Helena, and old-timers, who wonder what happened to their town.

Next month, we conclude our two-part look at the Napa Valley by examining how the so-called ‘metastasis’ of Napa city informs its growth and the impact on its populace.


Wine Tasting Room of the Week

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To cleanse the palate between wines, tasting rooms often offer taste-bud-neutralizing wafers and tap water. Here’s a better idea: a cold one pulled at Ernie’s Tin Bar, the best kept secret in Sonoma County. Located in the no-man’s land where Lakeville Highway and Stage Gulch Road connect like a wishbone (linking Petaluma and Sonoma with a hairpin turn worthy of a rally race), the unassuming tavern’s credo is rather brusquely summed up by its signage: “Beer, Soda, Etc.”

Google offers only passing references to the bar in the form of a few concise approbations on homemade travel blogs. Finding no trace of “Ernie’s Tin Bar” in their databases, 411 operators will either connect seekers to Finbar Devine’s, a paint-by-numbers Irish pub in Petaluma, or the tony Tin Barn Vineyards over the hill in Sonoma.

The bar’s ability to remain outside the reach of modern information technologies should be studied by the CIA for purposes of counterintelligence. The joint is invisible. It might even turn into a pumpkin at midnight. The Tin Bar is like the Sasquatch of local bars: legendary but seldom seen except by true believers and the occasional passing wine writer and his editor.Open nonstop since 1923 (except for three days when its namesake passed away), the Tin Bar isn’t a roadside attraction in the conventional sense. It hasn’t fossilized into kitsch or been unduly fetishized by acolytes of, say, midcareer Tom Waits.

Which is to say that the bar isn’t sufficiently self-conscious or ironic for those inclined to artful slumming. The patrons are genuine salt-of-the-earth types (unlike fleur de sel ninnies like myself, who roll down Stage Gulch Road after a day in the tasting rooms and then get suddenly sentimental for the smell of cowshit). By contrast, Ernie’s Tin Bar is a drinking room, a ramshackle ode to corrugated tin and cheap beer, where one can crack complimentary peanuts and interject into any conversation so long as it’s not on a cell phone (at least two signs warn imbibers: “Use a cell phone, buy a round”).Some concessions have been made to the times. One will likely see more bicyclists than bikers at the pit stop, and the recent appearance of Eel River organic amber ale–a hoppy, caramel-hued concoction marketed as “good karma in a glass”–is likely a nod to changing tastes, though Budweiser (in both its original and “lite” varieties) remains ubiquitous.

To sop up the beer, organic or otherwise, microwavable grub of the frost-bitten, convenience-store ilk is available. The rubberized hamburgers and Hot Pockets may put the “ble” in edible, but as the bartender Chuck’s grandfather used to say, “It will make a turd.”

Go with Uncle Chuck’s homemade beef jerky instead. Try the homemade chutney provided by a customer. Dare you to spend $20 in an evening. And then go home and keep your trap shut.

Like Brigadoon, Ernie’s Tin Bar appears to those who believe, located in an auto-repair shop at the corner of Lakeville Highway (Highway 116) and Stage Gulch Road, south of Petaluma, on the way to Papa’s Taverna and Keller Estate Winery. Damned if we could find a phone number. Closes at 7pm–we know that for a terrible fact.

Editor’s note of sorrow: Daedalus is on hiatus until the spring. Look for his deathless prose to return next year.



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Letters to the Editor

December 6-12, 2006

Legalize it

Dale Gieringer is right ( Nov. 29). All of the problems with illegal marijuana-growing operations–and there are plenty–are the direct result of prohibition.

If marijuana were regulated and taxed in the same manner as alcoholic beverages, all of the environmental, labor and other rules that apply to other sorts of agricultural production could be applied to marijuana growers. The environment would be protected, workers would be safer and consumers would get a better product. And police could stop wasting time on marijuana “eradication,” which will never be more successful than was the eradication of booze during Prohibition.

Prohibition of alcohol didn’t stop Americans from drinking, but it did make gangsters like Al Capone rich. Prohibition of marijuana has simply repeated that unhappy experience.

Bruce Mirken, Marijuana Policy Project, Washington, D.C.

Neat bit of self-promo

I read with considerable interest your story about the raids on marijuana plantations in Bay Area parks (“Dark Green” ). But I’d like to point out that there’s more to the story after yours ends; somebody has to clean up the site, restore stream beds and take out the trash. Managers of public lands rarely have the budget to do this themselves, so they call upon volunteer groups to do the work. You can hear about what happens next in edition No. 19 of my podcast The WildeBeat, titled “Restoring a Park Gone to Pot.” You can download the show at www.wildebeat.net.

Steve Sergeant, San Jose

And yet more

A national debate on the potential dangers posed by elderly drivers has been sparked by the case of George Weller, the elderly man who drove his car through a farmers market, killing 10 people and injuring another 68 in the worst traffic accident in California state history. Weller, 89, recently received a sentence of five years probation; he is bedridden.

Many of the factors that make driving hazardous for seniors are difficult to diagnose and/or correct. These include slower reflexes, physical impairments, chronic disease and the effects of medications. One that can be easily diagnosed and treated is the decrease in visual ability.

A vision exam at the DMV, which tests only for a 20/40 visual acuity with or without glasses, is not sufficient to ensure that elderly drivers are safe drivers. These exams will likely miss other potential threats to driving ability that could be identified and treated or corrected during a comprehensive vision exam by an optometrist.

It is easy to locate a qualified optometrist by logging on to the California Optometric Association website (www.eyehelp.org) and clicking on the “Find an Eye Doc” link.

Karen Griffith, O.D., Petaluma

From the archives

I greatly appreciated (Napkin Notes, Sept. 13). These gardens don’t just teach, as Wolf writes, “where zucchini comes from”; they also help people develop relationship skills with their fellow gardeners, which engenders a real sense of working together, peacefully, for a common good. Gardens also heal people on many levels.

I feel discouraged, frustrated and scared because precious, life-supporting land is being turned into building lots due to overpopulation. People (and animals, birds, sea creatures and others) need wilderness to be nearby and accessible, not an hour’s drive away.

It is our connection to nature that returns us to our higher selves. Our society’s soul has been sickened, with predictable and unhealthy results as seen in the high rate of crime, drug abuse, dysfunctional relationships, cancer, etc. Gardens, therapy, communication classes and spiritual guidance would be much more effective than those surveillance cameras now everywhere in downtown Santa Rosa.

I feel so saddened by the high level of denial our society has about the fact that we live on a planet of quickly diminishing resources that we have polluted and exploited. I encourage all of us to help create a better world for the children who are already here and to stop after having one biological child. Adopt, co-parent, help a single parent, be a godparent.

Barbara Daugherty, Cotati

Mustiest of all

Re Gabe Meline’s (“Feeling Himself,” Jan. 4): I think that this article is amazing. I have a project due in a few weeks and have been thinking about how to start this paper. I already know I want to do it on Mac Dre, but I just can’t put it in words how much he means to me. His lyrics are so straightforward and from the heart it’s insane, his ability to create a whole new vocabulary and way of sayin’ things that has stayed around for so long. Mac Dre will always be remembered. Stuff that he put out will stay with us forever. To know that someone as great as him walked on this earth just two states away from me amazes me. I just want to say thank you for doing a story about him, and it still shocks me how many loyal fans he has to stay with him forever. I plan on driving to California and visiting his grave site.

Well. I’m in class, and your article almost made me cry, so I’m gonna keep on lookin’ for stuff on him . . .

One of a Million Loyal Fans, via e-mail

Good luck on that project. And hey!–stay in school, cuz it’s a great place to read year-old Bohemian’s online.


Gobbets!

December 6-12, 2006

Polymaths, rejoice! That same quality that makes you, the quotation-stuffed individual, so unbearable in social life is celebrated in The History Boys, the film of Alan Bennett’s successful 2004 play. The characters go in for the Oxford-Cambridge game of “gobbets”: hear a quotation, identify the originator, explain why it bears relevance to a subject at hand. If you still ache with a chronic case of “dreaming-spires envy,” this film is for you.

Featuring a cast plucked entirely from the award-winning National Theatre production (including the extras, who are Theatre employees), The History Boys takes us to the glory that was Yorkshire in 1983–Sheffield, in fact, later to be the setting of The Full Monty. At a minor public school, a squad of working-class students prepare for the admissions interview. All have high hopes of places at Oxford and Cambridge; all are being prepared by Hector (Richard Griffith).

Griffith is never to be forgotten for his performance in Withnail and I, where he played Uncle Monty–lecherous, theatrical and bent as a dog’s leg. It’s been many years, but Griffith still has a face of immense comedic appeal–he looks as if he were descended from a long line of Toby jugs. Hector is a cracked variation of the beloved old public school teacher who has been a staple of British lore ever since James Hilton hacked out Goodbye, Mr. Chips. Grooming his students–and when I say “grooming,” I mean “touching inappropriately”–Hector teaches his charges the merits of discursiveness, of the odd quotation, the stray French phrase, the lines of unfashionable poetry by Thomas Hardy.

And then, as in all schoolroom dramas, the new teacher comes in. Stephen Campbell Moore plays the more handsome and brutally efficient pedagogue. He urges the students to think critically, instead of just letting their callow minds rove where they will. The opposition between the two main characters is a question of philosophy, between the emotional and the intellectual sides of the brain. The boys–who are as devilishly handsome as Dakin (Dominic Cooper) or as hapless as the gay, Jewish Posner (Samuel Barnett)–are surprised by what hard work school can be.

Bennett has been lightening the national mood in England since Beyond the Fringe, 40 years ago. Director Nicholas Hytner (The Madness of King George), who also directed the stage production in its London premiere, preserves his words without any serious effort to open up the play: circling camera movements here, a field trip to a ruined abbey there.

I thought the show could have used a woman’s touch. There isn’t nearly enough of Frances de la Tour, who played the giantess Olympe in the last Harry Potter. As a hapless longtime teacher at Cutler’s Grammar School, she gets out a show-stopping line about the woman’s point of view of history, but we never understand what drew her to the gloomy social science. (As I always say, those who can’t do, teach, and those who teach but know it won’t do any good, teach history.)

And the series of endings–including the loathsome theatrical device of the “where are they now?” speeches–violates what ought to be a ringing endorsement of the duffering, bookwormish life. The fun of learning is that we never know where it will lead, which secret password will open up what heavily-guarded door.

‘The History Boys’ begins Dec. 8 at the Rialto Lakeside Cinemas, 551 Summerfield Road, Santa Rosa. 707.525.4840.


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