.Thanks for Your Service

The decision made by the former president’s defense team members to relieve him of the burden of testifying in his own defense is a real surprise.

If there is one thing that has defined his life in private business and public life, it is his devotion to truth, justice and the relentless pursuit of American democratic ideals.

When he was offered the opportunity to serve his country during the Vietnam War, for example, he tearfully admitted to lifelong suffering from painful and debilitating bone spurs in his feet. He accepted an appointment to the Nixon cabinet as a bartender to serve the country on those spongy mats.

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And when he was invited to take part in Desert Storm, the campaign carried out by ground forces from the U.S. and allies in Kuwait and Iraq, he begged off, but offered free golf lessons to senior officers stationed in Qsar.

In March of 2003, in the initial invasion of Iraq, his crack hospitality team took over the Baghdad Ritz Carlton. It served fresh-baked oatmeal raisin and chocolate chip cookies, as well as 2% milk to troops returning from maneuvers in the evening.

That incredible gesture by itself reduced incidents of PTSD by more than 27% due to the homey, comfort food experiences our men and women enjoyed after a hard day of brutal combat in an inhospitable foreign land.

Perhaps the former president is not widely identified as a true American hero by some. Still, given the dangers and logistical nightmares involved, he has served his country in ways none of us can even imagine.

It’s just too bad he didn’t personally and publicly add to the historical record of his achievements in court, which would bring clarity to an unfortunate entanglement with an unpatriotic and unsympathetic adult film star before the election in 2016.

Craig J. Corsini sends satirical missives from a bunker in San Rafael.


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