I am “a sports guy” but I never got into placing bets. Mainly because my make-up is a weird, personal stew that includes a base of being bad at and terrified by math, a heavy dash of never having any money and an underlying note of not wanting a sporting event to bum me out more than it probably already will. Plus, I really suck at it.
Here’s the thing though: everyone sucks at gambling, they only think they’re good which is all part of the scam. I know this and so, I avoid gambling.
Over give-or-take the last five or so years, online betting has come out of the shadows, just like every other insidious form of human activity. The ticker across the bottom of ESPN shows odds for betting along with news and scores and the nation’s number one online sports betting site, Draft Kings, frequently has advertising on the floors and sidelines of many professional sports. While every state but 11 (including California) allow for sports betting, the internet has made such boundaries pointless via a simple VPN (a Virtual Private Network) one can toggle their internet connection so websites that allow gambling in your state no longer know what state you’re betting from.
I discovered all of this last year around this time as I got a wild hair to place a bet on the 2025 Oscars. The timing was even more ill-advised as I had less money than usual but, figured if I merely put $100 into this, I might break even or even make money. It’s that latter thought that gambling sites are placing winning bets on.
I plopped in $100 and made some bets. As is not at all surprising, I have no clue what I bet on. In fact, at this very moment, I cannot recall what movie won Best Picture so, it all comes together in a meta sort of way. Long story short, I spread my money around, $10 here, $20 there and won some and lost some and when the curtain fell, my $100 was $71.00. I considered myself lucky to have only lost $29.00 so set about getting the rest back and, lo and behold, one must have $100 in their account to withdraw their money.
This seems illegal and weird and like a scam and it’s 100% what I get for dipping a toe in troubled waters. So, I’ve sat on this $71 for a year, not willing to allow myself to bet here and there on sports. I’ve been awaiting the Oscars to reclaim my C-note.
Did I mention I am also “a movie guy?” Well, maybe I buried the lede. But I love the Oscars and am pretty good at picking winners. But, I really don’t understand what the “plus” and “minus” stuff means when betting except “plus” equals favored and thus, you don’t want to bet on that person as you won’t win money.
For example, as I write this pre-ceremony, Michael B. Jordan is favored (-163) with Timothée Chalamet next at +163. I thought DiCaprio was favored but now he’s at +1100 so I bet $5 on Leo and if he wins Oscar gold, I would win $55.00. Not bad! I also dropped $10.00 for Sinners to win Best Production Design (Frankenstein is favored) and if I guessed correctly, I win $70.00. My big bet is Train Dreams winning “Best Adapted Screenplay” which, for a $15.00 bet will “earn” me $243.75.
Is it dumb? Yes. Is it pointless? Definitely. Will I laugh all the way to the bank if my biggest longshot: Kate Hudson winning Best Actress nets me $250.00 off a $10 bet? Absolutely.
