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Newsgrinder Tuesday 01.30.01 Coach Craig Brennan may have answered the age-old question of how wrestling coaches get their veins to pop from their necks, reports the Marin Independent Journal. The Marin Catholic High School mat wrangler was arraigned in Marin Superior Court on drug charges stemming from his mid-January arrest, when authorities said they found him with a baggie of methamphetamine on the school campus. "Stoned Cold" Coach Brennan is charged with possession of methamphetamine, being under the influence of drugs, and most likely to be played by Harvey Keitel in a made-for-TV drama. Brennan, who is free on his own recognizance, says optimistically, "I think these charges will be dismissed." Monday 01.29.01 Extra! Extra! Read all about it: Bat Boy and the Samurai Kid strike again! The Press Democrat reports that the devious duo stormed a Santa Rosa 7-Eleven on Sunday and proceeded to chase the clerk away by wielding a baseball bat and a Samurai sword before emptying the cash register. No word if the would-be yakuza was shamed by this low-ball heist and sliced off his own pinky. Saturday 01.27.01 Donald Breckwoldt, citizen hero, found a live bomb in his Terra Linda yard and brought it into the San Rafael police station's front lobby, prompting closure of the station and adjacent City Hall, reports the IJ. Breckwoldt nailed it when asked why he took the explosive device to the police instead of calling 911: "I don't know. I just did it. It was a stupid idea." Always chivalrous, Breckwoldt brought his girlfriend, Vickie, along for the perilous ride. "We go everywhere together," he said. "We had to go to San Rafael anyway to get lunch, so we dropped this off." According to the hero, the police station staff summarily "freaked." Breckwoldt, who says he has no known enemies other than Lex Luther, said he is "a little ticked off" about the incident. "It worries me that some lunatic is out there blowing up things and scaring people to death," he said. "If I catch him, there ain't going to be no fingerprints left. I want this mother caught quick because he deserves to spend life in prison." Word. Wednesday 01.24.01 Petaluma's ArgusCourier.com reports that a vandal who etches a bizarre epitaph into downtown Petaluma store windows has racked up an estimated $10,000 karmic debt. Most of the damage was caused by the etching, but there has also been some spray painting as well, said Sgt. Mark Hunter (who apparently found his name on a crumpled piece of paper in the writers' lounge of cable network). The police department is working with the city's graffiti abatement team, however, officials are mystified by the culprit's tag, which reads "Got windows? Call Morty's Window and Glass Co." [ North Bay | MetroActive Central | Archives ]